Seven Years

Seven years
I've spent trying to dodge the lies
living life from joy
to meaningless joy
filling the void with shameful highs
and pretending it's the dream I kept inside

I've given into temptation
until there's nothing left to surrender
and now I only see tearful nights awaiting me
as I stare into my future's horizon

Because it's just another need to me
like the food I eat
it's hunger cured with shame
and a pain that stains my pillow
when I try to rest on those empty nights
wasted where I don't belong
getting things I'll never need

I never beat my demons
just changed them ones with smiling faces
while carrying promises never meant to be held
I pretended everything was fine
when I was more broken than ever
just a shell of who I could have been
and a shadow of what I was before

I want to turn and face the truth
but how can I fight who I am
How can I conquer what I need
when I feel it beating within my veins

So as I lay here
temporarily pacified
with tears of shame streaked across my face
and broken promises ringing in my head
I cower in the dark again
too weak to stand up to myself
powerless to challenge who I am
even as the world plays my weaknesses
like a bow on a violin
I know the struggle will never end
only abated by momentary joys

Even when gazing into the eyes of love
I'm just a pathetic soul
born again just to be sacrificed
like so many times before
in these seven years
I've lived through the blur of addict's eyes
where highs are lows
and everything in between is a bed of lies
and though I see the truth now
and gaze upon my sins with open mind
the world remains unchanged

For it's seven years until tomorrow
tomorrow when I'll be broken again
just another empty day
spent bowing before my vices
while trying to call it life
between dodging the lies
and living the meaningless joys
I've come to know so well

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68 Responses to Seven Years

  1. Ray says:

    I love it, it's a perfect example of what emotions dark poetry give out.

  2. Emma says:

    very good but greg i dont believ you

  3. Brett says:

    That is great….exactly how i feel.

  4. Simon says:

    ermmm….

  5. amber says:

    hey i really like all of your poems and you are a great writer ok that is all

  6. Glenna Davis says:

    hey I'm really feelin this poem b/c i can relate to what you are talkin about, it is very good and i just wanted to let you know that! well LATER!

  7. Phia says:

    Makes sence

  8. lostunicorn says:

    exactly how I feel, like I'm empty inside…like I'll never really live…

  9. Tayler says:

    i love ur poetry so much. ur words are so beautiful. the world can b a dark cold place. believe me i know. im a lost soul. ive done way 2 much 2 b saved by grace. the crosses will burn on me skin if i dare touch them. u look at the world in the eyes of beaty lust and hate. u have such a wonderful way of putting things. keep writting the beutiful stories and poems. they touch people. so u r doing a good thing. helping people and doing what u love. its like i can feel the burning of passion burning from my lips when i read ur work. u have such great passion for your work. i read it in ur words.

    Tayler

  10. Heather says:

    Everytime I read each poem that you've written seem more and more beautiful each time. Each one seems to come from a world of it's own. It's awesome. You might become the next Poe or Dickinson.

  11. Robin says:

    Sweet melancholy.

  12. Cassandra says:

    I hope my pain doesn't last seven years. I feel for people who suffer for that long.

  13. thorne says:

    yall need to stop bitching about life being sooo difficult and suckign so much — go spend a few years in africa or other poor countries then write me a song about how your man doesnt like you anymore or your computer wont work right

  14. Dante says:

    i've suffered for 18 years but hope that someday it will end before i make a bad decison
    i love this poem it reminds me of my past

  15. brett says:

    wow that is great its very powerful and moving speaks the truth

  16. Sakari says:

    its a moving and powerful poem keep it up

  17. annemarie says:

    Great poems…
    i love when someone else can put to words what i feel…

  18. kassy says:

    i love it i feel like this most days like im too waek to even think about giving up my addiction to pain

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